Does I Cor. 7:10-11 Give Permission For Married Couples To Separate? By David J. Riggs Some brethren insist that I Cor. 7:10-11 gives married couples permission to separate. Those verses say, "And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife." (KJV) Thus, the Lord very plainly says that a wife is not to depart from her husband. Paul was showing that the Lord had already commanded such during His personal ministry. He said, "Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate."(Matt. 19:6). The same word "chorizo" (put asunder, separate, depart) is used in both Matt. 19:6 and 1 Cor. 7:10-11. Please let me ask a very simple but important question: "If I Cor. 7:10-11 is giving permission for the wife to depart, upon what conditions can she depart?" If her husband does not take out the garbage, can she depart? If he does not constantly say, "I love you" can she depart? If he spends money on himself rather than on her, can she depart? The only reason for departing which the Lord gave was: "except for fornication." (Matt. 5:32; 19:9). No one has the right to devise other conditions for departing which the Lord did not give. Some say that verse 11 of I Cor. 7 gives the wife permission to depart. It does no such thing. It only shows what to do if there is a separation. In other words, it is the Lord’s will that they do not depart, but if they do depart, they are to either to be reconciled or remain unmarried. A father may say to his teenager, "You cannot wreck the family car, but if you do wreck it, here’s what you need to do." Since he gave instruction on what to do if he wrecked the car, does that give the teenager permission to wreck the car? Certainly not! Likewise, it is against the Lord’s will (sinful) for them to depart to begin with. If and when some do depart, they are not to compound their sins; e.g., by remarrying. Thus, the verse is not giving permission to separate without sinning, but is showing that one is not to make matters worse if they do separate. I have heard both Carrol Sutton and Wendell Wiser, two of the most loved and respected defenders of the faith in the brotherhood, use I John 2:1-2 as a parallel to 1 Cor. 7:10-11. Those verses say, "My little children, these things I write to you, so that you may not sin. And if anyone sins, we have an Advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous. And He Himself is the propitiation for our sins, and not for ours only but also for the whole world." The parallel is obvious. God commanded: "A wife is not to depart from her husband" and "These things I write to you that you may not sin." Since God added further instructions, it does not give liberty in either case. In other words, since God added, "if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband," it does not give her permission to depart, any more than "if anyone sins, we have an Advocate with the Father" gives one permission to sin. The action of separation (by means of legal action or whatever) violates several other divine principles: (1) The sacred marriage covenant made before God and man ("till death do us part," etc.) has been broken. (Mal. 2:14-16; James 5:12). (2) It destroys one’s influence and/or example.(1 Tim. 5:14; Titus 2:3-8) For example, if one Christian couple can separate without sinning, why can’t all Christians couples separate without sinning? (3) It is a disregard for the Christian principle of doing good for evil.(Rom. 12:14,17,21; 1 Pet 3:9; Matt. 5:44). (4) It promotes adultery.(Matt. 5:31-32) One or both of the separated parties may commit adultery. (5) Action has been taken which brings about disobedience to a host of commands. For example, they are to love each other (Eph. 5:25; Titus 2:4), they are to have sex relations (1 Cor. 7:2-5), the wife is to submit to her husband(Eph. 5:23-24; 1 Pet. 3:1-5), the husband is to be the head of his wife and dwell with her with understanding(1 Pet. 3:7), etc. Let all married couples strive to make their marriage pleasing to God rather than twisting the Scriptures to allow a separation. "Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate." (Matt. 19:6). * * * * * * * * * * * * * Bertha Williams Hall Sept. 10, 1882 - Jan. 4, 1975 "A Beautiful Life" About an hour and a half drive southwest of Montgomery is the community of Awin, Alabama. A number of years ago bro. Ules Reid preached with the congregation there. Behind the church building is the Awin Community Cemetery, and among the monuments is one with the above epitaph. In 1919 Miss Bertha Williams married a widower by the name of Flavil Hall, bro. Gardner Hall’s father, Bill and Sewell Hall’s grandfather, and thus the connection to several here. While in Awin two weeks ago, several of the members reminisced about sis. Hall. Listening to their recollections made me think how fitting an epitaph on her tombstone. Each day I’ll do a golden deed, By helping those who are in need; My life on earth is but a span, And so I’ll do the best I can. To be a child of God each day, My light must shine along the way; I’ll sing His praise while ages roll And strive to help some troubled soul. It was commonly held that sis. Hall daily helped those in need in numerous ways. She visited many, especially on Sundays, for the purpose of encouraging them in their service to the Lord. One of the members mentioned how she always wanted Scripture read before leaving the person visited. If anyone missed worship services, he/she received a card from sis. Hall along with a visit. Bro. Jesse Godwin, one of the long-time members at Awin, remembered how sis. Hall was the only one outside his family who wrote him consistently while he was in World War II. It would certainly seem sis. Hall was one who did the best she could. No doubt why mention was made that if it had not been for her and two or three others, the church would have folded at some point in its history. Sis. Hall was a caregiver for her family. Bro. Flavil Hall’s son, Leslie had polio, and sis. Hall made her house his house until she died. She also cared for her brother and sister, allowing them to live in her home until they died. Certainly she helped those who were "in need." We live among so much selfishness today that people seldom want to be bothered with others’ problems. This is not the case with anyone who lives "a beautiful life." (Please note Galatians 6:1-2) Though not having any biological children, she had a keen interest in others’ children, always remembering their birthdays with cards. Thinking and doing for others seemed to be her life. The only life that will endure, Is one that’s kind and good and pure; And so for God I’ll take my stand, Each day I’ll lend a helping hand. Early in life she understood that the only life which endures is life lived in Christ and in His service. Baptized at the age of 13, she devoted 79 years of faithful service to the Lord. Always present at services, she is still remembered as the only one who prepared the emblems for the Lord’s supper for years, bringing them in a basket each Lord’s day until declining health prohibited such. Also mentioned was the fact that she and bro. Flavil Hall lived in her grandfather’s house, and she continued to live in it after he died. It is believed her house was built before the Civil War. Members recalled it being a very modest house and "airy," as one said, especially in the winter! In addition to living in somewhat isolated surroundings, sis. Hall was known for her cheerfulness and bright outlook toward every day. Those remembering sis. Hall indicated a great contrast was evident in her happy disposition when compared to her surroundings. It would seem she comprehended fully Jesus’ statement: "Take heed, and keep yourselves from all covetousness: for a man’s life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he possesseth."(Luke 12:15) Two or three mobile homes are situated on the lot where the old house was, now long gone. A beautiful house with the finest of furniture fitted with the latest appliances never saved anyone. While nothing is wrong with having those material things, the truth is they will not "endure" as will "a beautiful life." While going down life’s weary road, I’ll try to lift some trav-ler’s load; I’ll try to turn the night to day, Make flowers bloom along the way. Sis. Hall is remembered as one who never complained. When around 90 she broke a hip from a fall, and while that pretty much ended her activities, she was not bitter nor did she complain, but maintained her cheerful spirit. Some mentioned they never heard her complain about anything. She is also remembered as being truly hospitable. She was always happy to have people in her home. (Hebrews 13:1-2) From all indications sis. Hall was one who attempted to "turn the night to day," and "make flowers bloom along the way." It is good for us to reflect on the lives of faithful Christians. Standing at her grave I couldn’t help but think what I have and haven’t done since Jan. 4, 1975, the day she died. A quarter century has passed, and people in that community still remember her "beautiful life." Though she is dead, her influence, like Abel’s, yet lives in the lives of those who knew her.(Heb. 11:4) If you or I died today, would anyone remember our "beautiful life"? Would it be "beautiful"? Would it be worth remembering? Have we considered our lives are "but a span," that judgment is in the future for each of us, and that we must be about the Lord’s business the best we can? Not every epitaph accurately describes the life intended. It would seem however that this one has. Would to God that each of us would live our lives in such faithfulness to God and service to our fellow travelers to eternity that on our tombstone it could be truthfully engraved, "A Beautiful Life." -- p.a.o. |